“W!Z!B!” by Mr. Smog Monster

On this day, 22 March 2013, after several meetings of the Secret Tribunal on Horseshittists’ Ethics, and in light of the murders of long time H.S. members, Grover Von Eyesocker, Jr., and H.S. founder, Dr. Augeas P. Houyhnhnm, the Horseshittists group is hereby dissolved, by unilateral consensus of all dues paying members.

For those members who wish to continue associating for the purpose of artistic and satirical expression, a new group, under the leadership of Houyhnhnm’s second in command, Admiral Thomas J. Haha, is hereby formed and decreed active:

The Wham!ers Zamm!ers and Blamm!ers, aka: The W!Z!B!

This new formation of the H.S. is aimed at being more commercially viable and attractive to the general population than the H.S., allowing W!Z!B! actions to more easily penetrate (WHAM!) into “popular” media and, hence, reach deeper into the social consciousness. This will, in turn, draw in more dues paying members, producing more CASH (ZAMM!), allowing for the production of larger and more spectacular actions (BLAMM!) As the Christian Sects embrace the Old Testament, so shall the W!Z!B! embrace all tenants of H.S. doctrine, and new members to the W!Z!B! shall be expected to learn and understand H.S. concepts and commandments. The works set forth by Dr. Houyhnhnm and Von Eyesocker, Jr., as well as all the other architects of the H.S., are still deemed valuable and shall continue to be utilized in to their full extent in W!Z!B! thought.

The new Chief Officer of the W!Z!B!, Admiral Haha, served for several decades as a member of the H.S. Secret Tribunal, and has also been the author of several media pranks, which for litigation purposes shall remain unnamed, that more than qualify him to head this new incarnation of the group. In addition, Haha is physically fit and all surviving members of the H.S. believe him capable of withstanding an assault by any insane androids that may still be hunting former H.S. members.

Long live Admiral Haha and long live the W!Z!B!

—Mr. Smog Monster, Secretary of the W!Z!B!

https://primitiveentertainment.wordpress.com
http://readadamnbookwithrfy.blogspot.com
https://schoolofmadnessastruth.blogspot.com/
https://www.facebook.com/richard.f.yates/

[Originally posted 22 Mar. 2013 @ The Primitive Entertainment Workshop]