"Selecting The Future (From Various Options)" by Richard F. Yates (Holy Fool)

 

Man... It seems like I've been really busy lately. I'm a doodler and a scribbler. I like to draw in my little notebook and write wistful journal notes about this and that, but since my return to THE COMPUTER, I've been burning my brain-power trying to catch up on all the projects that I neglected while I was off having adventures! I'm making progress (got a new radio show recorded, made my vacation zine, getting some new NFTs minted, plus DJing a big company picnic, going to a funeral [sorry, "celebration of life"], running errands, and trying to keep up with all the social media platforms...), but I still have stuff to do! (When do I get to just chill out and draw???)

 

And tomorrow, I'm hanging with my granddaughter most of the day (which will be fun, but not very conducive to business), Friday is another doctor visit in Portland, and Saturday is FREE COMIC BOOK DAY (which we're going to spend in Vancouver, Washington, checking out the I LIKE COMICS shop and the Saturday market.) So TODAY should be when I get some work done-----but I'm frazzled, already, and it's only 9:AM.

 

Maybe I'll chill for a bit, just listen to some tunes and such, and see if I can conjure some energy after lunch... Maybe that's what I'll do... (After I take some ibuprofen...)

 

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"Sleep. (Frog)"

[Ink on notebook page with digital embellishments and color.]

 

Don't look now, but I think a dream frog has slipped out of my subconscious...again... If it gets away, it could mutate (in the "reality air") into just about anything! Whoops! There it goes....

 

https://nftshowroom.com/gallery/richardfyates_new-genesis_sleep-frog-by-richard-f-yates-hf

 

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An interview that I did with Matthew @ Cent back in July of 2020

 

https://anchor.fm/ma-fer5/episodes/Spotlight-Playing-simple-creative-games-with-artist-Richard-F--Yates-eg5k35

 

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Three pieces that I collected today from NFT Showroom by jemzign !!!

Check out NFT Showroom here: https://nftshowroom.com/

 

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Successfully emptied and reloaded my iPod (32 gig---that takes some time to manage.) Ate lunch with Mariah, now (instead of taking a nap) I’m going to DO STUFF! Let’s start with a few more unresolved vacation bits...

 

I don't know why I'm like this, but I sometimes collect ephemera---stuff that's meant to be used and then thrown away. As far as ephemera goes, what's less permanent than a freakin' napkin? Here are a few that I grabbed on our vacation (for some reason) that I just got around to scanning today...

...and here's a flier for City Lights bookstore! (My scan of the flier given away freely at the store.)

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That's probably enough silly stuff from me for today. I finally gathered enough GUMPTION (obviously) to drag the scanner out of the office (so I could listen to tunes on the fancy soundsystem while I scan a bunch of stuff.) Hopefully, I'll get a bunch of materials digitized, and maybe start writing a post for tomorrow. I won't have time to work on anything until right before bed tomorrow, so the more I get done today, the FANCIER tomorrow's post is going to be! (Ha!) (I wrote "Ha!" because I don't know if ANY of my posts are "fancy," but I try to share the stuff that interests ME... If you're into other stuff, that's cool. I'm doing MY thing...)

 

Later!!!

 

 

---Richard F. Yates

(Primitive Thoughtician and Holy Fool)

 

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“Free PDF Zine for Funky Folks!” by Richard F. Yates (Holy Fool)

 

After visiting the SF Museum of Modern Art AND City Lights bookstore AND-AND this cool comic shop in Ashland, Oregon, that sold zines and underground books (I can’t remember the name, unfortunately), I felt the urge to just make some ARTZ. You can see in this zine the obvious influence of some of the abstract art that Mariah and I saw at the various galleries and museums that we visited, but the idea of just communicating my MOMENT---the feelings and thoughts that were running through my head as I was sitting by the pool and watching the human display flopping around in front of me---was also important. (I like to sit with my back to a wall, so people don’t get behind me. It’s a neurotic thing…)

 

If you’re interested in art or cartooning or communication, feel free to grab a FREE copy of this zine (in PDF format) and give it a look! If you’re amused, let me know. If you are inspired to make your own zines, send me information on how to get my hands on a copy. I love examples of free expression, and I’d be happy to let you know what I think of your creation! (Get that conversation started!)

 

Here’s the link:

BY THE POOL ZINE (July 2021)

(14 pages of STUFF drawn on July 30th 2021, mostly by the pool at the Flamingo Hotel in Las Vegas, Nevada.)

 

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1_Y6s4I83HtKGZ6RQzDaYUOTBw6LKpAkB/view?usp=sharing

 

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Thanks for stopping by! If you enjoy weird things like this, here is a list of several OTHER free PDF zines that I’ve made for people to enjoy! Give these suckers a look! (FUN!!!)

 

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23 ARTZ + WORDZ zine Issue #1

(23 somewhat randomly chosen, tokenized works of crytpo-art, created by me over the last four years on various platforms, PLUS the wordz that give them context or help the art make less sense!)

 

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1YOrq_CGoGTv_NYmn7iG13RFTxtryVzKZ/view?usp=sharing

 

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SMALL TOWN SHADOWPLAY (UNFINISHED ZINE)

(Lit zine collecting the unfinished SMALL TOWN SHADOWPLAY serialized story! Do-it-yourself ending!)

 

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1AafDYDv0Cj05cD8m8l2kxRD-E0I35CQ4/view?usp=sharing

 

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METAPHORICALISM (001)

(12 inch by 12 inch digital collage pdf.)

 

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1gJrWzCi6YkIaislryg69ScG2Q3F1zkin/view?usp=sharing

 

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PUNKTRONIC COVER ART PDF

(The first 37 pieces of "cover art" for my PUNKTRONIC pirate radio podcast.)

 

https://drive.google.com/file/d/13UOCbfLsDl9kc9P7bOfKyz-ayqvQEDIS/view?usp=sharing

 

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IMPOSSIBLE TO PRODUCE ZINE 01

(Odd collage "zine" produced at 30 inches by 30 inches... Not sure why I did it this way, but there ya go!)

 

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1W3Ij8vhBrViRpbyMZN1nhrjVNMSrRwvs/view?usp=sharing

 

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FAKE ARTZ ZINE

(Art / lit zine.)

 

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1JdjzBmEdGVTLPbfOd2JArxtI8s0AEd0u/view?usp=sharing

 

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THE FIRST LAUGH

(11 inch by 17 inch propaganda poster!)

 

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1c6UKxoBm1ze-2BsVpwgyl_G73FQtEXH3/view?usp=sharing

 

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I think my next post will be either a new radio show (on 3Speak) or a book review. I have to DJ a big company picnic tomorrow, so I’m not sure if I’ll get around to posting anything, but by Sunday, I should be ready to rock-n-roll again! See you then!

 

---Richard F. Yates

(Primitive Thoughtician and Holy Fool)

 

SUPPORT INDEPENDENT FOLKS WHO ARE JUST MAKING STUFF BECAUSE THEY LOVE IT!!!

 

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“I’m BAAAACK!” by Richard F. Yates (Holy Fool)

 

Did you miss me? It’s good to be back home again. Hello to any NEW folks out there in DIGITAL LAND (William Gibson called it “Cyberspace,” but we’ll forgive him.) If this is your first encounter with my rambling shenanigans and primitivist artworkia, don’t take anything you are about to encounter TOO seriously. Just go with it. (Once you’ve reached Consciousness Level 13, it ALL becomes serious, but for now, just have fun…)

 

For the last two weeks, my wife, Mariah, and I have been trapsing across four different states, driving and walking and flying our way around Washington, Oregon, California, and Nevada. We spent the first half of the vacation driving to San Francisco and back. Then we took a day to wash our clothes, grabbed our younger daughter, and flew out of Portland, Oregon, off to Sin City (Las Vegas.) We spent five days in the scorching heat, noise, and debauchery before finally returning to the cool, calm, and comforting Pacific Northwest.

 

During our adventures we visited museums, art galleries, bookstores (including CITY LIGHTS!), comic shops, restaurants (FUCKING EXPENSIVE!!!), casinos (we don’t actually gamble, but the flashing lights are cool), and even a very nice pool. (It was perfect for ME because I tend to burn to death in even moderate sunshine, and this pool had a faux-cave area with a waterfall feature where I spent most of my time in the shade! I got to float around in the water but didn’t combust!)

 

One overpowering THING that I was confronted with, HEAD ON, during this entire trip was the rampant, crass, disgusting (in my view), pointless consumerism. All flash and no substance. There were LINES to get into certain branded retail shops, and in one of the art galleries I visited, the curator (or clerk or whatever) suddenly lost interest in our conversation when he realized I wasn’t going to buy a $1,000.00 unsigned Miro lithograph. A thousand bucks IS actually a decent price for a Miro, even unsigned, and if I were a wealthy feller I might have considered purchasing it! However, if you are the type of person who is only interested in art or design or creativity because of the MONEY, then you’re missing the entire fucking point of ART, and I feel a sense of profound sorrow that these entirely materialistic folks are so intimately involved in the ART WORLD. Well, maybe I’m not feeling sorrow, but a Holy Fool ain’t supposed to feel RAGE, (I’m too goddam enlightened, unfortunately), so sorrow is how I would describe my emotional state when I see works meant to inspire wonder or create connection to something DEEPER---but all most people seem to do is reduced the work to a fucking dollar sign… It’s bullshit---and one of the reasons that I’m enjoying my experiences in DIGITAL LAND. There is a COMMUNITY to be found there, and it’s incredibly easy to make and share NFTs and pdf zines and make direct contact with other creative types through social media---with people who appreciate these works for MORE than their monetary value.

 

BUT now we’re home again---THANK BOB! We both agree that we’re going to avoid ever taking TWO vacations back-to-back any time soon. In fact, I personally, would be happy just not going back to Vegas OR San Francisco at all! (Too big, too many people, too expensive, too much of pain trying to get anywhere, too...much…) Mariah and I loved Ashland, Oregon, though, (where we stayed the first night), and I’d be perfectly happy to visit there again any time. Honestly, I think our trips to the coast in Oregon and Washington are still my favorite vacation destinations…

 

This isn’t to say we had a bad time on this trip. We saw City Lights bookstore (as a fan of Allen Ginsberg and Lawrence Ferlinghetti, visiting this store was one of my life goals), the San Francisco Museum of Modern Art, watched a live performance by Criss Angel, and spotted a million cool, weird, off-beat things. (I’ll be making a couple different travel zines so I can share a bunch of the photos I took!) Both Mariah and I came away from the experience inspired and ready to get back to work. (I also wrote and drew and read a bunch while we were vacating, and I’ll be sharing that stuff, either as posts or zines or NFTs, in the near future!) I’ve also reconfigured my understanding of what social media IS and how it can be used (for things like archiving and connecting---connecting with other people AND connecting various works to each other.)

 

So that’s it! We’re back home and ready to get rolling! Keep an eye out for lots of new work over the next couple of weeks!!!

 

LATER!

 

P.S.: [For fun, here’s a piece I drew today that shows an example of that “connecting” I mentioned above. A friend of mine posted an image of the morning sun (affected by the local wildfires), and I made a digital drawing OVER her image and shared it as a comment under her post! It’s simple, but it IS a form of connecting!]

---Richard F. Yates

(Primitive Thoughtician and Holy Fool)

 

SUPPORT INDEPENDENT FOLKS WHO ARE JUST MAKING STUFF BECAUSE THEY LOVE IT!!!

 

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“Trip” by Randy Long

A trip I went on and took a friend named Rick and a pup named Zeus.

Well, we were traveling in an old, grey Dodge van, 1978, half-ton, no window van, slant 6, one of those that would almost last forever. No windows and good on gas. Well, we started off getting supplies, and as an added thing, we stopped at Hostess and got some little pies. Rick loved those apple pies, and I got chocolate and cherry pies, and off we went.

We took off from Longview and headed east. We went by Morton and drove through Packwood and stopped on top of White Pass, took Zeus out and walked him about. He was about 6 months old and a Rottweiler, a happy go lucky little pup. By the time we got to White Pass it was getting dark, so we pulled over for the night.

When morning came, we ate, and off we went. Well, we just left White Pass and went to Yakima. The weather was nice. It was the beginning of August, and we decided we’d head for The Dalles.

We got back as far as Stonehenge, near Mary Hill Museum, and took Zeus out once again. We put Zeus back in, and stopped at Mary Hill Museum, locked the van in the shade. Well, we were gone no longer than half an hour, and when we got back to the van we found that Zeus’s favorite pies were apple, just like Rick’s, and Zeus had ate most everyone of his, but didn’t touch mine. I think Zeus was as happy as he could be, but for some reason, Rick didn’t find the humor in it.

Well, it was time to go, so off we went. We traveled down the Gorge and into Vancouver, crossed the bridge into Portland, went towards the zoo, and took Hwy 26, on our way to the coast. We went to Jewel and seen the elk in a refuge there, and off we went. Further down 26, near Hwy 101, was the largest spruce tree. We were off again.

Rick, my friend, brought music. Some was good and some not so good. One song, about drove me out of the van, was a little ditty, goes, “Right Round Baby Right Round.” By about the 37th time, I was “Right Round,” if you know what I mean, but most everywhere we went, the radio reception left something to be desired. Twenty years later, I still have a problem with “Right Round Baby.”

Down Hwy 101, we got to Cannon Beach. My favorite stop, Ecola State Park, is a breathtaking view. Indian Beach is a great place to surf. I’m, personally, not a surfer, but it’s amazing to watch, like the windsurfers up the Gorge.

Strolling down the coast, around Nehalem, there’s a viewpoint. You see off a cliff, and you can see for miles on a clear day. The next stop we stopped at was Rockaway Beach. A bit of fog was rolling in, but the sun was out and warm. If I remember right, the next stop was Lincoln City, and we seen whales through binoculars, pushing water out their spouts.

Then, I believe, was Siletz. The day we went through, they had a big Indian get-together up on top of a mountain. We wanted to stop, but it was getting late, around 10 at night, and it was a long day, so we found a place to pull over and go to sleep, down off 101, next to the ocean.

The next morning we were off again, getting a little bored along the coast. It was time for a change. We seen a road to the left that said “Green Acres.” We had to go. (After all, Green Acres is the place to be. The old series with Eddie Arnold.) So Green Acres, we are there. Nothing really to see, kind of disappointed. Back to 101, and we went to Harbor, Oregon, about the last stop before you go into California, so we stopped there.

We got burgers at a little diner right on 101, kind of a 50s diner. Rick and I got something for Zeus, and away we went, heading back towards I-5, to Medford. From Medford, we headed north on I-5 towards Portland, stopping in a little town called Brownsville. I swear we were in The Twilight Zone, or maybe it was the land that time forgot.

Rick and I pulled into town and immediately knew something was wrong. We were driving the newest vehicle in town, a ’78 Dodge van. Something wasn’t quite right. The cars were from the 50s and even everything in the shops was vintage. The people were dressed in 50’s attire. I think the cop’s car was a 1950 Ford Bullet Nose.

I looked at my friend, and he even said, “Did we go back in time?”

I’m not sure. We stopped and even on display in a window of the local hardware store was an old style bike from the 50s. We still don’t know to this day if we were in The Twilight Zone or just a 50’s reunion. It was time to go, ’cause there’s no place like home.

Brownsville, now, is just a memory. On our way home, naturally, we got caught in a traffic jam in Portland, but in 50 more miles we were home. An hour of so later, we pulled into Longview. Home at last.

—Randy Long

https://primitiveentertainment.wordpress.com
http://readadamnbookwithrfy.blogspot.com
https://schoolofmadnessastruth.blogspot.com/
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“Walupt Lake” by Randy Long

One of the last secluded lakes in Washington, that I know, is Walupt Lake.

From Longview, you go up I-5 North to Hwy 12 East, towards Packwood, WA. From Longview it’s about 27 miles on I-5 to exit 68, Morton / Yakima, Hwy 12 East. Go 62 miles east to Forest Rd, NF-21, to Walupt Lake. Exit to the right. Take the next right to stay on the Forest Rd, NF-21. After 7.5 miles, go slight right. Stay on NF-21 another 6.6 miles, then turn left to stay on NF-21 for 2.1 miles. Turn left toward NF-2160 for 4.5 miles. Total of 112 miles and about 2 and half hours, about 21 of the Hwy on mainly gravel roads. You come to a beautiful lake at the end of the road.

You pull into Walupt Lake and across a bridge into a park. A creek runs out and a creek runs in on the back side of the lake. Open from 5/23 to 9/9, and you need a reservation.

—Randy Long

https://primitiveentertainment.wordpress.com
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“The Long Round Trip” by Randy Long

Up in the hills by Randle, WA, is a place called Pinto Rock, up on top of a hill, out in the middle of nowhere. If you drive there, make sure you have a reliable vehicle, and not a Low Rider, either. If you go, you’ll be pleasantly surprised, it’s one of the most beautiful drives.

Another drive that’s really nice is from Longview to Randle to Cougar to Woodland to Longview. Go up I-5. It’s about a 7 and a half hour round trip, about 240 miles. You go up I-5 to Hwy 12 East. Take Hwy 12 East to Randle, WA. It’s exit 68, the Morton / Yakima exit. From Longview to Randle is about 79 miles, and about an hour and a half. From there, at Randle, make sure you have a full tank of fuel. Between Randle and Cougar, there are NO gas stations. From Randle to Gifford Pinchot National Forest is about 50 miles, but it’s a winding road, a couple of hours long. I believe the road is NF-23 to Gifford National Forest. It should say from Randle to Cougar.

Once you get to Gifford National Forest, your next stop is Cougar, 65 miles from Gifford National Forest, and about 2 and a half hours on NF-90. It’s all on the same road to Cougar. From Cougar to Woodland is only about 30 miles, about a half hour. From Woodland, take I-5 North to Longview, WA. It’s about 30 minutes more to downtown Longview, about 25 miles away.

It’s a long trip, but along the way there’s Mt. St. Helens, the Cowlitz River, Riffe Lake, Scawena Lake, Morton, Randle, the lower and upper falls of the Lewis River, Cougar, the Ape Caves, Spelieye Bay, Yale Lake, Beaver Bay, Lake Merwin, Horse Shoe Lake, Mayfield Lake, Silver Lake, Kress Lake, the Kalama River, the Columbia River, Lake Sacajawea, and probably other places I did not mention. Places to fish and hike, camp, take pictures, and enjoy the drive. I’ve, personally, drove it several times.

—Randy Long

https://primitiveentertainment.wordpress.com
http://readadamnbookwithrfy.blogspot.com
https://schoolofmadnessastruth.blogspot.com/
https://www.facebook.com/richard.f.yates/

“Yelm UFO Fest and Cosmic Symposium – The Dust Settles” by Richard F. Yates

On Friday afternoon, 28 July 2017, Michael King and I made the drive to an interesting little town about 30 minutes east of Olympia, WA, USA. The goal for the weekend was to sell some shirts and observe the goings-on at an actual, honest to goodness, UFO festival---full of TRUE BELIEVERS and fun seekers…

The image below is from the first day as we were setting up shop. Michael, who is the mind behind Bonemill D-Signs and the H.E.X clothing line, as well as one of the primary creators from the Art Horse collective, created several UFO / alien themed garments just for this event---and frankly, they went over quite well!

Did I see any UFOs at the event? Only one…

I did, however, see a great many aliens.

What I set out to do (besides help Michael with his booth) was to listen to the believers and see what they had to say. I’m a skeptic when it comes to UFOs and aliens visiting our planet, but I had no desire to try to challenge anyone’s stories or personal experiences. I just wanted to hear what they had to say, and it turned out that we had a number of people visit our booth who had stories that they wanted to share. (More than I thought we would have!) I heard several eye-witness sightings, learned that the C.I.A. is now based in Washington State (because of all the UFO activity here), saw some photos from one guy’s phone of what he claimed was a UFO captured while he was taking snaps of the moon, heard a bit about the Ramtha School of Enlightenment, talked to an interesting older Native American fellow who said his tribe has believed in the “Star People” for many hundreds of years, and we even got to hear some stories from a guy who had worked as a radar reader in the 1960s and claimed that he “got paint” on an object moving at over 6,000 miles an hour! (That’s fast…) Some of the people who chose to share had a bit of a “creepy vibe” that made me feel rather uncomfortable (perhaps a bit TOO intense for my taste), but most of the visitors we talked to were friendly and pleasant.

Unfortunately, even after a long and enlightening weekend, I am still not convinced that aliens are visiting us here on Earth.

Saturday was hot, but there were still a great many people who came by the festival. Many of them said that they spotted the event as they were driving by and decided to check it out. I don’t blame them---it was basically a big carnival. Throughout the day there were vendor booths with a variety of weird themes, like “Sacred Geometry and Art” or “Spirit Portraits” or various alternative diet foods and other (somewhat sketchy) products and information services. There were also food carts and ice cream trucks and a beer garden and music performers from morning to night for all three days. (My favorite band played on Saturday night, The Fabulous Downey Brothers, and they had a very new wave style, kind of a Devo meets Techno, with costumes and a backing video with great, cheesy, 80’s style computer graphics. I was definitely impressed!) (The photo below is from a folk singer / Native American dance act that played Friday night.)

As I said at the beginning of this post, Michael ended up doing well at the event. About halfway through the 2nd day of the fest, the coordinators ran out of shirts in most of the popular sizes, (underestimated the demand), and they started sending people over to Michael’s booth to buy some of his designs, and then the customers could take the shirts back to the main information booth and have the Yelm UFO Fest logo heat-pressed onto the backs! Even without this extra sales boost, the UFO and alien shirts sold very well, particularly the “I Want to Leave” design and the Adamski Flying Saucer on tie-dye.

For my first UFO festival, I’d say it was a pretty good time. It was WAY TOO HOT, especially on Saturday, and it was a loooong weekend, but worth the drive, for sure. (We left directly from work on Friday, and didn’t pull back into my town until almost 6:00 P.M. on Sunday evening, and Michael lives even further down the freeway than I do!) Overall---it was fun. I might even be inclined to go again next year!

---Richard F. Yates
(Commander in Cheap of The Primitive Entertainment Workshop)

https://primitiveentertainment.wordpress.com
https://www.patreon.com/primitiveentertainment
http://readadamnbookwithrfy.blogspot.com
http://themuseumofwhatilike.blogspot.com/

“Travelogue – 001: Evergreen Lanes, Everett, WA”

Lanes, Everett, WA”

Since our younger daughter was in middle school, she’s enjoyed competing in bowling tournaments. (She’s 19 now.) As such, we’ve traveled to about a thousand bowling centers all around the West Coast. This weekend was the 2017 Washington State USBC Queens Tournament in Everett, WA. However, we learned long ago that bowling is only a part of the excitement and that we need to make these trips into mini-vacations.

With that in mind, on Friday morning (24 Mar. 2017), we loaded a bunch of luggage, snacks, and NINE bowling balls into the Escape, stopped by Starbucks, and then hit the freeway. Our first stop was the Centralia Outlet stores where Elise purchased (for the first time in history) some bowling skorts from the Nike store. (The primary reason for this outfit choice was so she could show off her cool Crash Bandicoot tattoo.)

Next, we traveled further north, past Olympia, until we decided we were hungry and then stopped for a bite at a Mayan restaurant. (The food was pretty good.)

Back on the road, we started hitting traffic just south of Tacoma, right around Lakewood. (Happens every time.) And thus we began THE I-5 CREEP. From this point on we crawled north, inch by tedious inch, water splashing the windshield, giant trucks pushing their way in front of us, and the bathroom calling in a high-pitched, unpleasant voice.

After an eternity, we reached Lynnwood, WA, and the thrill packed Alderwood Mall! (It wouldn’t have taken quite so long to get there, but the stupid cell phone gave me some very bad directions...That robo-lady is a bossy jerk.) We hit Build-a-Bear, Vans, Abercrombie & Fitch, Hollister, Hot Topic, Cinnabon, etc…. The women-folk bought some clothes, Ellie got a pair of shoes, and we all chomped some sugary goodness. After the main mall, we ventured to Barnes & Noble (down the street a ways), and I get a couple of books.

By now it was dark, still rainy, cold as SMURF, and we zipped back onto the freeway for the last few seconds of the journey to Mukilteo, WA, and the Hilton Garden Inn, which was surrounded on three sides by Boeing! (Those planes are big up close, and I’m phobic… So creepy…) The room was perfectly adequate, and we were tired from driving, so we crashed and burned pretty quickly.

The next morning, 9:00 A.M., was check-in for the WSUSBC Queens Tournament at Evergreen Lanes (which was about 10 minutes away from the hotel.) The house has 20 lanes, which are synthetic, and wood approaches, and there were 36 women there all attempting to take home the crown! There were also a number of fun people there who we were very pleased to see and talk to, bowlers and spectators both, and these people, the regulars, the BOWLING FAMILY, are the main reason that we love going to these tournaments. (This is at least true for Mariah and I---Ellie might be more addicted to the challenge). The competition is great, but getting to visit old friends is really what it’s all about.

Qualifying was six rounds on a 40 ft. “flat” pattern. (“Flat” means that the oil goes from edge to edge of the lane. On a normal “house” shot the oil coats the first 35 to 36 feet down the lane, and the thickest oil is in the middle of the lane, getting drier as you get closer to the edges. This helps people who hook the ball make it to the “pocket.”) Long story short, the shot was TOUGH, slick as an ice-skating rink, and scores overall were pretty low. (Only one bowler averaged over 200 for six games, and the cut was minus 159!)

Ellie had a rough time on games two and three. Lots of splits, couldn’t get lined up, and she might have even started to lose heart (just a bit), but thanks to some great advice and encouragement from a couple of friends (Thanks Cindy Mattingly and Tanner Spacey!), Elvis found the right ball and a great line and made a SERIOUS comeback! (She even cracked 200, twice, on this very challenging shot.) Unfortunately, the last frame of the final game of qualifying, she needed a double (two strikes in a row) to make cut, threw a GREAT ball, and the 7 pin started to fall, but got bumped by another pin and stood back up! (She missed cut by 8 pins!) The Bowling Gods just didn’t want it to happen this time. Elvis was upset when she realized she didn’t make it to the second round, but quickly got over it, and we stayed to watch our friends who made the semi-final rounds! (Congrats to Crista, Lori, and Cindy for making it to bonus bowling!)

We watched the next four games while we ate some lunch, then said our goodbyes, and dashed back to the hotel! (Stopped at DQ for some frozen desserts, and mine had a bit of wire in it, like from a Brillo pad or something, so they made me a new one---even though I’d already eaten like a quarter of it! Awesome…) Although we considered taking a nap once we got back to the Hilton, we noticed that the swimming pool was unoccupied, so we quickly changed and hit the water! The pool was tiny and not very deep, so we did what any group of people like us would do in that situation, and tried to create a whirlpool by quickly walking around the edge of the pool in a circle. (Oddly, we chose to walk counter-clockwise. I’m not sure why…) We splashed around, had a fun time, sat in the hot tub for a bit, then went back to the room for that nap. When we woke, we found a local pizza joint (Brooklyn Brothers) and grabbed some pie.

Sleeping in hotels is never easy for Elvis or myself, but we were tired again, so we did eventually crash. The next morning (it was Sunday by then---funny how that works), we got up, gathered our gear as quickly as we could, and drove straight home, somehow sliding through Seattle, Fife, and Tacoma without incident. All in all, it was a great weekend. We got to visit with some very entertaining people, Ellie felt pretty okay about how she bowled at the event, we had fun shopping and swimming, and we got home nice and early. Couldn’t really ask for more than that, and I can’t wait for the next tournament!

---Richard F. Yates